I randomly heard from Jon this week by email. He asked me how my summer was going so far and if I had fun at the volleyball tournament over the weekend (creepy, I don't remember telling him I was going to that!). Some questions: Is this guy for real? He ditches me, stops all communication and then follows up for some small talk? Did his gf just dump him? Did he realize he had made a huge mistake? My curiosity got the better of me. I asked him if he just woke up from a really, really long coma. After a few cryptic responses from him, I flat out asked him what he wanted. He said he just wanted to say "hi". I didn't respond back - I thought that might send the best message of all, although he does seem pretty clueless.
Why is it that as soon as you've written someone off, they find a way to pop back into your life?
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Cruel Intentions: Dave
two days after our last date, i decided to give Dave a call. after a bit of phone tag, we finally connected and chatted briefly. and that was the last i've heard from him! it's now been over a week since our last date. i guess sometimes a bit of game play is involved, as i refuse to be the one to contact him yet again. i figure if he was genuinely interested in me, he would make more of an effort. it's just so confusing because when we were on our dates, especially the last one, i felt like he was really into me. so what went wrong? i just wish that dudes could at the very least be consistent.
i explained this situation to a group of ladies up at a girls cottage weekend recently. one of them had a good point. if the guy doesn't meet your "deadline" of when YOU think he should call you, move on. for example, one cottager explained that she would totally be fine with Dave following up a week later. a week later, really!? not me. i'm totally not a high maintenance kind of chick, but how hard is it to touch base every few days? it takes two seconds to send a text message or shoot off a quick email (or hell, pick up the phone!), even in the busiest of times. i won't budge on that one. and that's exactly what she was saying, don't budge. good advice, i thought.
------------
later....
sometimes i don't always listen to good advice. it felt like every minute that passed, i grew angrier and angrier. i needed some closure, if nothing else. i decided to text dave. he responded with "what's up?", so i bit the bullet and laid it all down. i told him that i liked him and was having fun getting to know him better and wondered if the feeling was mutual. what came next surprised me. he claims that he messaged me on Canada Day, as well as sending other messages (not sure if on the same day). i explained that i never received any messages from him and that it sounded like a misunderstanding (here we were, both thinking the other person was extremely douchey for not following up!). he said that he always had a fun and great time when we hung out, but that when he didn't hear back from me, he kind of assumed the worst and was really bummed out and it made him realize that maybe he's not yet ready to date again. huh?! was he really just going out like that? what do you say to that? also, did i or did i not call it on date #1 when i felt as though he was enjoying being single? again, i just explained that it's unfortunate that there was a misunderstanding... he responded again explaining how he really liked me, but that if we continued to see each other, it would probably get serious and he can't do that. message loud and clear. better to find out now, than later on down the road.
this was a new one for me. hey, i'm super into you and really enjoy spending time with you... buuuuut i'm afraid it's going to get serious and oh, ps- sorry for making out with you and sending you all kinds of crazy mixed messages, but i don't think i'm ready to date. a big part of me is suspicious of those "text messages" he apparently sent me. it was almost as if he was turning it around on me: well, you didn't respond and left me hanging so i kind of moved on. THIS is the exact problem with text messaging in the dating world. can someone work on that, pleeease?
i decided to have a facebook deleting party-of-one and blare Lady Gaga's "Monster" and call it a night.
i explained this situation to a group of ladies up at a girls cottage weekend recently. one of them had a good point. if the guy doesn't meet your "deadline" of when YOU think he should call you, move on. for example, one cottager explained that she would totally be fine with Dave following up a week later. a week later, really!? not me. i'm totally not a high maintenance kind of chick, but how hard is it to touch base every few days? it takes two seconds to send a text message or shoot off a quick email (or hell, pick up the phone!), even in the busiest of times. i won't budge on that one. and that's exactly what she was saying, don't budge. good advice, i thought.
------------
later....
sometimes i don't always listen to good advice. it felt like every minute that passed, i grew angrier and angrier. i needed some closure, if nothing else. i decided to text dave. he responded with "what's up?", so i bit the bullet and laid it all down. i told him that i liked him and was having fun getting to know him better and wondered if the feeling was mutual. what came next surprised me. he claims that he messaged me on Canada Day, as well as sending other messages (not sure if on the same day). i explained that i never received any messages from him and that it sounded like a misunderstanding (here we were, both thinking the other person was extremely douchey for not following up!). he said that he always had a fun and great time when we hung out, but that when he didn't hear back from me, he kind of assumed the worst and was really bummed out and it made him realize that maybe he's not yet ready to date again. huh?! was he really just going out like that? what do you say to that? also, did i or did i not call it on date #1 when i felt as though he was enjoying being single? again, i just explained that it's unfortunate that there was a misunderstanding... he responded again explaining how he really liked me, but that if we continued to see each other, it would probably get serious and he can't do that. message loud and clear. better to find out now, than later on down the road.
this was a new one for me. hey, i'm super into you and really enjoy spending time with you... buuuuut i'm afraid it's going to get serious and oh, ps- sorry for making out with you and sending you all kinds of crazy mixed messages, but i don't think i'm ready to date. a big part of me is suspicious of those "text messages" he apparently sent me. it was almost as if he was turning it around on me: well, you didn't respond and left me hanging so i kind of moved on. THIS is the exact problem with text messaging in the dating world. can someone work on that, pleeease?
i decided to have a facebook deleting party-of-one and blare Lady Gaga's "Monster" and call it a night.
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